Sunday, January 17, 2016

Blah

I just really need to get this off my chest. Almost 2 months into my job, my view and feelings for it hasn’t changed at all. I keep denying it to myself but I really am not happy where I am at the moment career wise. Getting a permanent job is such massive improvement in my life but surprise, it doesn’t make me a happy person.
On the other hand I’ve never been more driven to find another job in fields that I know I’d enjoy.. But ugh it doesn’t mean I’d actually get another job that easily. Those chances are low if not impossible =.=;
Anyway I guess I’m also frustrated that I don’t have enough time to do things I enjoy because I’m always so mentally tired after every shift. I’m grumpy and moody that I can’t blog and update my instagram with quality uploads. I have sponsored stuff I need to get sorted out but I just really can’t find the time to take pictures. On my day off I’d like to take care of myself, catch up with people, play games and basically chill (I don’t even watch anime anymore, but to be fair, there’s nothing that’s keeping me on my toes at the moment).
I miss doing freelance. Being creative. Making contents. Meeting like-minded people. Keeping myself relevant with my interests. I have Adam though, it’s really a blessing to have someone as your happy place. I can still keep my shit together thanks to him.




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Sunday, January 10, 2016

Wish Wish


Canvas Backpack | Demonia Shaker 52 | Mam Avantgarde Tights | Lumee Case | Nyuly Choker


Never really had the chance to splurge myself with any shopping last Christmas or Black Friday. I’m quite proud of myself but it’s not like I have a choice? I was (and still am) hella broke, with all the moving thing going on I fear that my wishlist may never see the light. But when you get stressed or bad days slowly accumulating and creeping up on you, sometimes all you need is a little window-online-shopping..
So what I have here is somewhat a very realistic wishlist for when things are all settled down. I not going to buy them in one go. Maybe one off every month? But my mind change so fast anyway, who knows if I can really stick to this..
But since it’s a mixture of need+want I do think it’s possible. Like for example, the bag, I need a proper bag for work and I’m not exactly the handbag type of person at the moment. I tend to over pack so I need something that has a lot of compartment and can be for daily use and over nights.
I’m pretty sure of getting Demonia Shaker as well as I didn’t buy any shoes the whole year! Yes! No new shoes! The latest one I bought was the Demonia Stomp 08 that I got last January 2015. GASP. I do now realise the financial state I’m in, to not be able to afford new shoes the whole fucking year?! (But to be fair, I can be so picky!). Still, for someone who considers herself stylish (lol) that’s a big deal.
Still unsure if I’m keen getting the flame tights and socks, they’ve been in my past wish lists but uhhhhh idk I’ve always had this impression shipping from Japan will always take ten years.. Like seasons has already changed and I’m still waiting… lmao.
This Lumee case though, I’m pretty sure it will take me a bit of time to buy it as I’m planning to get a phone upgrade. So this selfie case will have to wait.

Have you completed any wishlist you had in the past?

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Monday, January 4, 2016

Video Selfie Game


I think it’s about time I recognise video selfie as a thing~! Somewhere inside there's this part of me that always wanted to be a Youtube vlogger but totally clueless what to talk about, am I just going to waste internet space if ever I decided to be one? But it's too much effort! I don't even have the equipment! So for now let me stick to taking selfies, but this time in video, it can be fun~ Thanks to Snapchat’s filters, its given birth to a whole new way of taking selfies :3

I have here enumerated some apps that I use:

Tuesday, December 29, 2015

s a y o n a r a

♥️
Another year is ending in two days and it makes me reminiscent of the things that has happened. Most of this year was spent being clueless what to do with my life, I was just floating aimlessly, getting by somehow.
Coming here in UK, I felt a bit disoriented with my goals, as I need to start from scratch in terms of career and pretty much everything else. Looking back, I was constantly worrying but I easily distract myself with the help of anime, some gaming, and social media. Having random part time jobs kept me on my feet but sure is never enough. I’m a ball of unsure and whatever-goes.
Lonely, insecure with my communication skills, and broke in a strange land. I’ve never been so sick of my disposition in life. Despite how I felt, I keep telling myself how grateful and thankful that I get to be here. So I went out and met people,just for the sake of trying. but just when you think it couldn’t get any worse, I got rejected and end up badly hurt emotionally. Whatever’s left of my self confidence all went down the drain and I grew hateful and mistrustful..

Friday, November 20, 2015

Etude House: Dear Darling Tint In Vampire Red


GRASS IS ALWAYS GREENER ON THE OTHER SIDE!! I’ve generally ignored Etude House cosmetics when I was in Manila. I thought they’re very overhyped and invested more on packaging rather than the quality of their products. But when I came here in UK, my thirst for asian cosmetics is something that drove me insane..

Friday, November 6, 2015

ACNL Update


Aside from work one of the biggest reasons why I was gone/painfully inactive for some months is because of Animal Crossing: New Leaf (GASP). I had to let go of all the other games I was playing as well. LoveLive, Touken Ranbu, Cytus, etc.. All thrown out the window to make way for Animal Crossing. I suck at game time management, ok? Also it’s like I found everything I needed in this little world. I refused to see friends, refused to dress up make myself pretty, refused good sponsorship offers, piled up sponsored posts, locked myself in a dark room and just disappear (apart from the occasional struggle of updating my twitter and ig).
Next thing I knew 2015 is almost over and everyone has moved forward while I’m still here, clutching my 3ds.. Was it worth it though? YES! (Haha, not really! But I am having fun)

So, um, for what its worth, here are what’s up recently!